Charlie Sheen

What happened to this lovable misfit from "Ferris Bueller's Day Off?" 

Frankly, there's so much news about this amazing man these days that I wont even go into all of it at length, but I will say this...

Charlie is now one of the highest paid actors on television working for the absolute worst show on television, "Two and a Half Men," next to anything Tyra Banks hosts of course.  He apparently was just divorced, where I thought any priest would have just looked at him at the altar and said no fucking way am I taking credit for this one.

Lucky for Sheen, he and his wife signed a prenup allowing her just a small 55k a month for child support for their twin boys, who apparently were taken from Charlie's crib once everyone realized the kids were brushing their teeth with emulsified cocaine.

I feel bad for the man I think of as genius.  He was recently quoted by some news group who I would have thought made everything up until I realized that only a brilliance that is Charlie Sheen could have said it.  Mr. Sheen said, and I quote, "I am on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen.  It's not available."  I like where this is going.  He goes on to say, " If you try it once, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body."  Well said and no doubt delivered by a completely sober and coherent Charlie, not the completely drunk and incoherent Charlie that we've been hearing so much about recently.  I sure hope I never succumb to peer pressure and try Charlie Sheen. 

Don't worry Charlie, you still have at least one fan rooting for ya.  You once said you blinked your eyes and in a nanosecond, cured yourself.  I believe you and urge you to blink your eyes once more to cure yourself from the terrible show that is "Two and a Half Men" and return to your roots.

J.C.